​To begin, there are some things you should know about me…I make my living as a scientist. I had an international upbringing, moving around a lot. I grew up without religion in my immediate family. Growing up my only exposure to faith was through my maternal grandmother whom I spent time with every year. She took me through Our Father every night and church when in France (my siblings were old enough, and blunt enough, to say "no" to all of this). This was an experience filled with lots of warning and words that I didn’t understand, but no warmth.
 
I began consciously exploring the idea of my own spirituality as an adult. I identified a gap, a need for something more than I had in my life. I turned to the one person who knew me best and with whom I share an unconditional love, Jeanne. However, our conversations about this didn’t exactly happen the way you might think that they did. That is, I needed answers and so, reached deep into the “scientist” part of me, and started asking questions; it was nothing short of an assault. Who could blame me, I had me a bona fide, albeit recovered, Catholic and I needed answers.
She was so very patient with me…
But faith is hard to explain.
 
Fast forward a wee bit farther in my life, through exploration of the Unitarians, and we come to walking into the McFarland UCC where I meet amazing people who are so very good. Fast forward ever so slightly more and we come to the reason that I am speaking to you today…
 
My wife Jeanne was asked to go to the Wisconsin Conference of the United Church of Christ as a delegate from our church. Shortly after accepting, she found out that she could not go. No one had spoken to me about this and so I didn’t know much about what it was; only that my wife had been excited to go and felt awful about letting anyone down by backing out. I then surprised myself saying that I’d go. Never in my life have I seen her eyebrows shoot up that far that fast. To be honest, I surprised both of us in that moment. But I assured her that I was in and to let Rachel know.
 
As the time approached I went to the website and officially signed up, looked at the meeting schedule and began feeling apprehensive; who was I to take this opportunity? After all, I didn’t exactly think the way other members did. I didn’t even actually believe in God, what was I thinking? And Robert’s Rules? I don’t even know who Robert was, much less what his rules are. (Not much of that at scientific meetings.) …I eventually convinced myself that this could all be made better in my head by reminding myself that floundering outside of my comfort zone is good and fun and means that I get to grow!
 
The night before I was to go I lay in bed and thought to myself that I could do right by this congregation if I did everything that I could to open myself to this experience and learn as much as I could. What I had to offer was me and so that is what I offered.
 
Joan picked me up Friday morning and after some getting to know you a bit better chitty chatting, I asked about expectations for a delegate. That’s when I also asked about Robert and his rules. She thought I was kidding… I quickly realized that one incredible gift that came out of this is experience right of the bat was that I had been given the privilege of finding a friend.

Though I started tentatively, as the weekend progressed I became more and more engaged. In between sessions of meeting, Joan and I cleared our heads and unwound our legs by walking the grounds, exploring the history that was there. By Saturday I began to recognize a slow and steady change inside of me. I began engaging with other members more freely. There was not a single event or moment of change, but I felt a shift. An opening. I even shared myself in a breakout session; believe that!